Lauren Goodger has revealed that she and ex Charlie Drury fell pregnant twice after their baby Lorena’s death but she suffered heartbreaking miscarriages both times.The reality star, 39, gave birth to her second daughter in July 2022, but she sadly passed away just minutes after she was born with her umbilical cord wrapped around her neck. She also shares daughter Larose, four, with Charlie.Now Lauren is about to release her new book Mum Of Two: Love, Loss and My Life on TOWIE about her ‘unimaginable’ death and has given a candid new interview about the time after her loss.She says that after Lorena’s death her and Charlie continued their relationship due to a ‘trauma bond’. Lauren explained ‘Just five days after Lorena died he woke up and told me he didn’t love me anymore. It was horrendous.’I was suffering panic attacks at night, terrified of dying and leaving Larose on her own. I still get them. I felt suicidal. I have done so since. If it wasn’t for Larose I can honestly say I wouldn’t be here.’ Lauren Goodger has revealed that she and ex Charlie Drury fell pregnant twice after their baby Lorena’s death but she suffered heartbreaking miscarriages both times The reality star, 39, gave birth to her second daughter in July 2022, but she sadly passed away just minutes after she was born with her umbilical cord wrapped around her neckShe added to The Sun: ‘Charlie and I had a toxic, trauma bond. After that, although we were actually separated, I fell pregnant again, twice to him, and then miscarried. We finally split for good in 2024. Now we are no longer in a toxic place. We co-parent.’Lauren added that she’d like another baby one day and if she is single would contemplate a sperm donor or adopting.Shortly after Lorena’s death, Lauren revealed she was rushed to hospital while in labour at home when her midwife couldn’t detect a heartbeat in her unborn child.She had planned for a natural water birth, to be carried out at her Essex home under the supervision of her midwife Tamzin – who had previously delivered Larose.Her waters broke on July 6 and initial vitals were normal, with Lauren deemed ‘low risk’ after giving birth to her first child without issue.Further tests were carried out the following day, during which the unborn child’s heartbeat was detected, but when her contractions began on day three the heart was no longer beating, and Lauren was rushed to hospital.Following a two hour birth more than ten doctors desperately fought to save Lorena by performing chest compressions and administering adrenalin, but to no avail.Back in March Lauren clarified her relationship with ex Charlie after they jetted off together for a family getaway their daughter Larose.Sharing a picture of the trio all wearing matching blue, Lauren claimed they go on family holidays for the sake of making memories with their daughter. She says that after Lorena’s death her and Charlie continued their relationship due to a ‘trauma bond’ (seen with daughter Larose, four) Lauren explained ‘Just five days after Lorena died he woke up and told me he didn’t love me anymore. It was horrendous’ Now Lauren is about to release her new book Mum Of Two: Love, Loss and My Life on TOWIE about her ‘unimaginable’ death Lauren then clarified her situation with Charlie, writing: ‘Just for our daughter we do family holidays, making memories for her.’Despite their turbulent relationship, Lauren and Charlie seemed to be back on track last year, when they were pictured enjoying another family getaway with daughter Larose.At the time sources claimed that pals were concerned that Lauren was ‘planning a future’ with her ex.However, earlier this year Charlie reportedly stunned pals by joining a dating app.Back in February Lauren announced she was releasing the new book about the ‘unimaginable’ death as Lauren said she wished to help others by sharing her experience. Sharing a photo of her autobiography on Instagram, Lauren wrote: ‘I am so pleased to finally tell you all that I am releasing a book! Mum Of Two will be on sale in July.’As you all know, my eldest, Larose, is the light of my life. She loves to be the centre of attention, just like me.’But my youngest, Lorena, is harder to picture. I never heard the sound of her laugh, or her cry. ‘I am writing Mum of Two as when the unimaginable happened, I couldn’t find a book that helped me during the most difficult times after losing my newborn baby.”This is my story of loss and grief, and of finding my courage and strength.’ Lauren added that she has put on a ‘brave face’ each day for her four-year-old daughter Larose, who is her world.She continued: ‘However much I have put on a brave face, it’s been so hard. I am a good mum to Larose, she’s my world. I am strong for her, I have to carry on.’Despite the battles in my life that no one even knows about, I’m still standing. I want to help others by sharing my experiences.’And you can actually preorder it on Amazon now! Thank you for all your support and love that’s kept me going love Lauren’.If you have been affected by anything in this article, please contact the UK Child Bereavement line on 0800 02 888 40 or the The Lullaby Trust on 0808 8026868 For support contact Miscarriage UK via info@miscarriageuk.org / 0303 003 6464